States Embarassed by El Tri in Final

The United States fell on its own soil for the first time in ages, and "fell" is an understatement. The States were picked apart by Mexico, 5-0, at Giants Stadium in the Gold Cup final.

Thanks to head-scratching defense from the Yanks, and superlative performances by Premier League attackers Giovani dos Santos and Carlos Vela, the "C-plus" team ceded their trophy back to El Tri, who will certainly have a chant or two for the visiting Americans come Aug. 12's World Cup qualifier at Azteca.

Where to start with the back end? Jay Heaps was an abhorrent for the second time in two weeks, while Heath Pearce wasn't much better. The latter defender remains unsigned, and would be best suited to hit the Major League Soccer circuit and practice against less than world class talent.

It's a shame for goalkeeper Troy Perkins, whose defense played tentative. Strike that, they played scared, and that's the most embarassing label you can apply to any unit. After a scoreless first half, the four backs played all sorts of ugly. This was more like the 3-1 loss in Costa Rica than the first team's losses to Italy and Brazil in group okay of the Confederations Cup.

Other notes...

-- Watching the Mexicans dance all over the New York grass -- and rightfully so -- really puts some heat and fervor back in a rivalry that has been one-sided. The States real squad needs to get something special going for the trip to Azteca next month.

-- Dos Santos was stunning, and Vela's addition to the game really underlined what the States were missing. As Max Bretos pointed out during the broadcast, Charlie Davies up top would've helped a ton.

-- Sure, I'm bitter right now, but before I suit up for a mens league match, let me comment on the broadcasting. Fox Soccer Channel's Bretos picked his most inept moments for the States most embarassing game. Tell me, Max, do they keep a whipping post inside a woodshed? Mixing up his metaphors with a shocking lack of knowledge for an announcer on his stage, Bretos couldn't believe Heaps was whistled for his PK ("not in my books"?) and completely skipped over the clear offside on the Mexicans second goal.

Throw all of that together with his first half disbelief that anyone could call this US team "less than a B-team." Hey, Max, B-teams are commonly referred to as reserve teams. Besides Ching, who else on that field is going to be there on Aug. 12? Maybe Stu Holden. Also, when Bretos is doing a better job, it's a heck of a lot easier to brush over his horrible pronounciation of every player with any sort of different name. You don't have to sound like a Mexican to properly announced a last name.

As a last note, the FSC crew might want to put the microphone a little closer to color man Christoph Sullivan's mouth.

2 goals for, 2 goals against, 2 transfers

So, we learned something very valuable in the 2-2 tie against Haiti in Game Three of the States' 2009 Gold Cup campaign: the United States' "C-plus" team isn't better than Haiti's "A" squad.

On a day when two young American strikers found new overseas homes -- more on that later -- the US rolled out a starting line-up of players extremely unlikely to make a dent in the 2010 World Cup's XI, and still played alright.

The States first goal was nice, but poorly defended by Haiti. Stuart Holden sent a swell low pass in to Davy Arnaud who used a calm, left-footed finish to put the States up 1-0.

Haiti's first goal was a comedy of errors. First, defender Jay Heaps was turned inside out. Then, goalkeeper Luis Robles can't get a finger on the big cross. Finally, no back post defender marks the goal scorer, and we're tied at one.

Hard to fault Robles on the second goal. Mones Chery -- pronounced like the French mon cherie -- hit a sick and somewhat lucky 20-plus-foot yard strike into the far-upper-90. It was essentially unstoppable. 2-1 Haiti, all in the span of four minutes.

But Holden would equalize with a strike just as nifty. To go near post from the angle he had was incredible, almost breathtaking when you consider it came in the second minute of stoppage time. 2-2 tie, and clinching the B1 seed for the rest of the tournament, which means the US will draw a much easier match-up the rest of the way. If Guadeloupe can upend Mexico on Sunday, the States may finish with only the second-best record in the tournament's group play.

The States will likely take on Panama or Jamaica on July 18 in Philadelphia, though there's an extremely outside shot they'd face Nicaragua. It would take a miracle, but after the Confed Cup, we know better than to assume anything.

If the States wins that matchup, they'll take on the winner of Canada vs. Honduras for the right to go to the Gold Cup final.

--- As for the transfer market, Jozy Altidore's Spanish adventure is over for now. After forgettable campaigns with Villarreal and Xerez, the Yellow Submarine has agreed to loan the 19-year-old to reigning Greek champion Olympiacos, so it'll be Champions League football for Jozy after all. Altidore will have to work for playing time over former EPL player Matt Derbyshire and young Brazilian striker Diogo.

Charlie Davies has moved spots on the continent as well, eschewing Hammarby in the Swedish Allsvenskan for Sochaux in France. A Ligue 1 squad, Sochaux finished 14th last season. Davies will get to take on his Yank teammate Carlos Bocanegra when his new team matches up against Rennes, and the most notable of his new teammates are Slovenia defender Bojan Jokic and Ivory Coast international Kandia Traore -- at least to me.

-- Good looks to Heaps, even if he looked awkward once or twice. The 32-year-old defender earned his first cap the hard way. Heaps played 299 MLS games before getting his first look with the national team. Congratulations, Jay.

-- My computer's out of juice and it's late. Good evening, and apologies for the shorter post. And if I missed some completely obvious things, forgive me... I've been awake for far too long. Went to the Taste of Buffalo, then helped some friends move before doing play-by-play for the Buffalo Flash and going to a wedding reception. Wow.